2022 Midweek TT Series - Week 6 - Everywhere I turn I see a traffic cone

23 June 2022

Week 6. Feels a lot longer than 6 weeks, maybe because I feel like I’ve constructed 15 different routes already. The bookmarks on my web browser are all just google map course possibilities. No doubt 90% are impossible due to roadworks. I used to like Bob the Builder. Scoop, Muck and Dizzy and Roley too – they can all bugger off.

I almost wonder whether someone from the council or BT (BT seem to be digging everywhere up) just troll me. Maybe they are keen followers of the Facebook page and see where I plan on having the next race and specifically send men in high-viz jackets out to that location. Though, apparently, I am supposed to blame Keir Starmer.

I suppose that roadworks aren’t the only disruption this week, the RMT strikes are causing a bit of hoo-ha. You almost have to hand it to the government that their main line of attack against the strikes seems to be ‘yeah, but we pay nurses and doctors shit too, so why can’t we pay rail workers sod all.’

The negotiations can’t exactly be described as a battle of wits when you have Grant Schapps - a man who couldn’t negotiate his way out of a revolving door. Then across the table, Mike Lynch, who has handed every bollock spouting Tory MP and journalist their arses on national TV the last week. The whole process makes me think two things, oooh I wish accountants had a strong union and an urge to rewatch the scene ‘What have the Romans done for us’ from Monty Python’s Life of Brian.

I think we all know a lot of UK infrastructure is shite. That’s not because of rail workers if the rail network is absolute arse. That’s because we have a privatised rail system where the big bosses value huge dividend payments rather than investment in the rail network. If you’ve ever wondered why train travel is so much more efficient, cheaper and nicer in Europe – then that’s your answer.

I didn’t have much of a government bashing last week. So, I am making up for it. Maybe this is where some of you catch up on current affairs.

To sum up recent events. We have a Prime Minister who when Foreign Secretary tried to get his mistress (now wife, he was married to someone else at the time) as a private secretary. When this got reported No 10 called The Times to have the story squashed. We have Priti Patel, a real-life Darth Sidious, shipping off refugees to Rwanda. Dominic Raab proposing a UK Bill of Rights, which does not do exactly what it says on the tin and is a Bill of Reducing Rights. And then Lizz Truss trying to blame the EU for the agreement the Tories negotiated, signed and championed. Hey, at least inflation isn’t running at over 9%. Oh.

In better news, the company I am Head of Finance for (the Finance department consists of, me), have partnered with the new Thor film. So, this is a bit of promo for that too. #beactiph. Especially as in a few weeks I may be able to provide a Red-Carpet Report. There is a chance I will be at the Premiere. Not sure if that involves chaperoning Natalie Portman yet, but one can hope.

#Compulsoryweddingchat of course. Only 6 weeks away. My speech is pretty much written. The initial draft is done. These reports have been good practice for it. A lot of the admin is close to being sorted. We’re just at the stage of buying wine, beer, finalising menu’s etc. I must remember not to drink the wedding booze before the wedding.

Ahhh I should probably talk about last night now. My Tuesday night was not great. I couldn’t celebrate my Ronde chaingang sprint victory with a Civerinos pizza. I mean why even bother going to all that effort to win a solo sprint if you can’t have pizza afterwards. Then when I got home I found out there were roadworks planned in Letham Mains. Insert not impressed face here.

Every week we’ve been affected. Hopefully next week we’ll be back on the lefty turny course. But who knows. Next year I am going to look at courses closer to Pencaitland as well and really mix it up. As well as roadworks, apparently, I need to be wary of the Macmerry flute band. It would be just my luck for a course to be canned because of a flute band.

Anyway, so we were back on the roundabout course of fun. If you’ve not done 5 roundabouts you haven’t done the course properly. 20 riders last night, which isn’t bad but well below last years numbers. The wind came out to play last night, the customary headwind on the homeward leg got progressively stronger as the night went on & I was very much regretting wearing shorts.

There were 3 ladies racing last night. The quickest of which was Sarah Scott of ERC, she came 14th overall as well in a time of 25:58. Kelly Rhodes was next in 28:04 and Rachael Butcher who just arrived in time to set off, finished in 28:38.

Of the road bikers. 3rd quickest and 13th overall was Peter Bonner of Ronde CC. I was in two minds whether to make a childish pun there, but I won’t, I simply won’t, won’t I? Maybe I should. No, no that’s too childish. Peter finished in 25:49. 2nd quickest and the quickest Easton was Alasdair Easton who was 11th in 25:30. The quickest road biker was Louis Moorehead of Ronde CC, Louis came 8th and completed the course in 24:27. Louis promised me pizza on Tuesday and I didn’t get pizza, not his fault at all and he didn’t strictly speaking promise either but it was an implied promise and that counts. I am still slightly resentful.

The top 7 all went under 24 minutes. 4th-7th were only split by 27 seconds. Warren Crombie of MRCC was 7th in 23:35. In 6th was Doctor and apparently a real Doctor at that, not a fake one like a Dentist, Doctor Oliver Teenan BSCS Hons MBA BMA TTFN, finished in 23:32. 5th was Basil Monks of ERC in 23:24.

Subtly firing himself into 4th place was Steve Canney of ERC. I miss the days of Steve’s glorious tache. Hopefully that’ll come back one day. Steve was 16 seconds ahead of Basil, finishing in 23:08.

The top 3 were comfortably ahead of the rest of the pack. 3rd last night was newcomer Matthias Weust of Ronde CC finishing in 22:23. A smidge ahead of him and suffering from his race number being stolen, the worst push off mankind has ever seen and the trauma of his manners being questioned afterwards was Sandy Waller, eternally 2nd. Sandy finished in 22:03. First & number thief, ironic as he works in the legal profession. Wait, maybe saying that is slander. Bugger. First was John Waller of EH Star with his 3rd win from 4 races. John was the only rider to finish under 22 minutes and comfortably so at that in 21:36.

Thanks again to all the volunteers. Simon, Abigail and Elijah for timekeeping. Jonathan, Neil and Neil’s daughter for marshalling. Sarah Emslie for tip-top t-shirt choices, putting the signs up & marshalling too. And me for standing around looking cold.

Results are here – Week 6 - Results

See you next week

Dan